A Step in the Right Direction

“There are 7 billion, 10 billion people in the world. Each one of them different.” My physician said to me as we looked at my x-rays. It was April 3rd, 2019 and I was at my orthopedic surgeon’s office for my next follow-up appointment after 4 weeks being there last.

The point he was trying to make by citing the world population was that it was difficult to predict how quickly and how well anyone would heal because every person was different. As a patient, I found this ambiguous answer disconcerting because I wanted to know evidence-based actions I could take to heal efficiently, but more importantly, effectively so I wouldn’t have complications in the future.

“You can do anything. Walking with your boot, without your boot. You can do it all!” He said as a woman entered the room, listening.

“Um, okay, so, I’m trying to understand better how hard I should push myself. Is it okay to experience pain? How much pain is too much pain so that I know when to stop?” I inquired.

“Oh, pain and swelling are normal. That will happen.”

“What should I do if I experience pain and swelling? I would guess that I would elevate my leg, ice it…”

“Yes, elevate, ice. Pain is normal. You just need to start moving that ankle.”

“Okay, that’s good. What about PT?” Many of my peers who have had broken bones had told me that I would enjoy physical therapy and that PT would help ensure my bones would heal well. I heard stories about how hips could become unbalanced from the limping and awkward walking.

“No, physical therapy is unnecessary.”

“Wait, really? Many of my peers who have had broken bones have all recommended PT.”

“Well, I can write you a prescription for it, but it’s really unnecessary. It’s just costly. You can do a lot of things on your own.”

“Do you have an idea of how long it will take before I can walk?”

“There are 8 billion people in the world…everyone is different.”

The woman who entered the room earlier interrupted to introduce herself as a nurse practitioner and began clarifying some points. She empathized with how it sounded like I wanted some direction and benchmarks. She said she would print some exercises that would be helpful before I left.

At that moment a few biases ran through my head about the two health care professionals in the room with me. The woman appeared young. I thought: “She is probably ‘new-school’ trained like myself to be more patient-centered. She is listening to me, she is responding to me, and she is reassuring me. Good job, I can tell that she really cares.”

My surgeon, on the other hand, was an older gentleman and an orthopedic surgeon. I am aware of the pressures surgeons face in their job and I recall the demeanor of an orthopedic surgeon I worked underneath for 8 weeks while as a student pharmacist. The surgeon I worked with was not very humanistic and hardly slept, but of course, that doesn’t mean that all orthopedic surgeons aren’t. Either way, my current surgeon fell in line with the only other orthopedic surgeon I knew, which was unfortunate from a patient perspective, but from a health professional perspective, sort of understandable…

“Okay, what so what should I expect to happen the next time I come in after 6 weeks?” I inquired.

“I’ll let you know if you are pushing yourself hard enough or not. Just keep moving.” The surgeon said, “See you!”

After he left, the nurse practitioner equipped me with a stretching band for strength exercises, a few recommendations of terms to look up on Google and Youtube, and a packet of written stretches. She shared that she had broken her ankle in the past and demoed a few of the exercises herself. She told me what a good start would look like, what to look out for as benchmarks, and reassured me that the clinic staff was available if I had any questions. If she had not entered the room and provided me with the information and tools she did, I don’t think I would have found the appointment to be as valuable or worth my time; especially with the commute to go that office.

In the future, I may explore transferring providers within the same network to the office closer to me, particularly if the point of the appointment is just to say whether I am pushing myself hard enough or not.

Anyhow, after the appointment I left in high spirits because I was feeling better and now I knew that I could push myself! This appointment was an affirmation that my mind-shift from resting mode to working mode a few days prior to the appointment was an appropriate shift. My actions were reflected in my transition where last week I was on my scooter, then on Monday this week, I tried using my crutches to travel to work, and then the next two days, including the day of the appointment, I used one crutch.

That evening I messaged a few of my friends to see if they were interested in seeing the cherry blossoms the following day. I knew that Friday would have crummy weather, Saturday would be too hectic, and I was traveling on Sunday to California for the following week. If I was going to see those flowers, I should try for Thursday!

And Thursday ended up being an incredibly encouraging and glorious day. Before Thursday, I had already decided in my mind that I was probably incapable of seeing the cherry blossoms in DC this year because of my mobile disability. But I knew it was up to me to change my mind from “cannot” to “can”. That I would have to be the one to challenge myself. I did have some confidence because with my history as a brain injury survivor, I know I’ve been through worse and that I am capable of being smart and “pushy” at the same time.

So yesterday, I met with a few friends and strolled/limped along a short stretch of the Tidal Basin. We then took a short 10-minute walk to the wharf, where my only accommodation was that I communicated I would not be able to walk around leisurely so a specific definition was preferred that wasn’t terribly far away. We ended up at an Irish pub where we shared fish and chips, calamari, and beers during a glowing, setting sun. The experience was really positive for my self-esteem and social and emotional well-being.

Later that evening, perhaps because I was very encouraged by my Tidal Basin walking attempt, I took off my boot and attempted walking on my bare leg to the bathroom. I was very tentative, it felt very awkward, and the process was very slow. While the distance was not very far, it certainly was a step in the right direction.

Yesterday was exactly 49 days since my accident. Therefore, 7 weeks out marks my first walk this spring. I suppose all of us don’t really recognize what we don’t have until we no longer do, but I can tell that my journey is on the upturn. Looking for many more positive steps! Appreciating the support along the way 🙂 Until next time!

Author: Jing Wu

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